《Did I Ever Tell You About The Man Who Taught His Asshole To Talk?》歌词

[00:00:00] Did I Ever Tell You About The Man Who Taught His Asshole To Talk? - William S. Burroughs (威廉·S·柏洛兹)

[00:00:15] *Man Talking*

[00:00:45] [Incomprehensible

[00:00:49] Did I ever tell you about the man

[00:00:50] Who taught his asshole to talk?

[00:00:53] His whole abdomen would move up and down

[00:00:57] You dig farting out the words.

[00:00:59] It was unlike anything I ever heard.

[00:01:02] This a** talk had sort of a gut frequency.

[00:01:05] It hit you right down there like you gotta go.

[00:01:10] You know when the old colon

[00:01:11] Gives you the elbow and it feels sorta cold inside,

[00:01:15] And you know all you have to do is turn loose?

[00:01:18] Well this talking hit you right down there, a bubbly,

[00:01:21] Thick stagnant sound, a sound you could smell.

[00:01:27] This man worked for a carnival you dig,

[00:01:30] And to start with it was like

[00:01:31] A novelty ventriliquist act.

[00:01:33] Real funny, too, at first.

[00:01:35] He had a number he called "The Better 'Ole"

[00:01:38] That was a scream, I tell you.

[00:01:41] I forget most of it but it was clever. Like,

[00:01:45] "Oh I say, are you still down there, old thing?"

[00:01:48] "Nah I had to go relieve myself."

[00:01:52] After a while the a** start talking on its own.

[00:01:57] He would go in without anything prepared

[00:02:00] And his a** would ad-lib and toss

[00:02:03] The gags back at him every time.

[00:02:07] Then it developed sort of teeth-like

[00:02:10] Little raspy in-curving hooks and started eating.

[00:02:16] He thought this was cute at first

[00:02:18] And built an act around it,

[00:02:19] But the asshole would eat its way through his pants

[00:02:23] And start talking on the street,

[00:02:25] Shouting out it wanted equal rights.

[00:02:28] It would get drunk, too,

[00:02:30] And have crying jags nobody loved it

[00:02:33] And it wanted to be kissed same as any other mouth.

[00:02:37] Finally it talked all the time day and night,

[00:02:42] You could hear him for blocks

[00:02:44] Screaming at it to shut up,

[00:02:46] And beating it with his fist,

[00:02:48] And sticking candles up it,

[00:02:49] But nothing did any good

[00:02:52] And the asshole said to him:

[00:02:55] "It's you who will shut up in the end. Not me.

[00:02:58] Because we don't need you around here any more.

[00:03:02] I can talk and eat and sh*t."

[00:03:07] After that he began waking up in the morning

[00:03:10] With a transparent jelly like a

[00:03:12] Tadpole's tail all over his mouth.

[00:03:16] This jelly was what the scientists call un-D.T.,

[00:03:19] Undifferentiated Tissue,

[00:03:22] Which can grow into any kind of flesh

[00:03:24] On the human body.

[00:03:29] He would tear it off his mouth

[00:03:30] And the pieces would stick to his hands like

[00:03:33] Burning gasoline jelly and grow there,

[00:03:36] Grow anywhere on him

[00:03:39] Anywhere on him a glob of it fell.

[00:03:42] So finally his mouth sealed over,

[00:03:45] And the whole head

[00:03:47] Would have have amputated spontaneous -

[00:03:50] Did you know there is a condition occurs

[00:03:52] In parts of Africa

[00:03:54] And only among Negroes

[00:03:56] Where the little toe amputates spontaneously? -

[00:04:01] Except for the eyes you dig.

[00:04:04] Thats one thing the asshole couldn't do was see.

[00:04:09] It needed the eyes.

[00:04:12] But nerve connections were blocked

[00:04:14] And infiltrated and atrophied

[00:04:19] So the brain couldn't give orders any more.

[00:04:24] It was trapped in the skull, sealed off.

[00:04:29] For a while you could see the silent, helpless

[00:04:32] Suffering of the brain behind the eyes,

[00:04:36] Then finally the brain must have died,

[00:04:39] Because the eyes went out,

[00:04:43] And there was no more feeling in them

[00:04:46] Than a crab's eyes on the end of a stalk.

[00:04:51] [Incomprehensible

[00:05:56] -End-