《Sames And Opposites》歌词

[00:00:00] Sames And Opposites (Live) - Demetri Martin

[00:01:16] In life there are many things

[00:01:22] Some of them are the same and some are opposites

[00:01:30] About some of these things I do sing

[00:01:39] A cactus is the opposite of a chair

[00:01:45] In my house you can sit anywhere but there

[00:01:51] Especially if your ass is bare

[00:01:59] A bird house is not the same as a bird home

[00:02:05] One is much more comfortable for birds

[00:02:14] These are sames and opposites my friends

[00:02:20] Which I determined

[00:02:45] A musical is the same as a burlap sack

[00:02:51] I would not want to be in either

[00:03:16] A squirrel is the same as a can

[00:03:22] When there's a bb gun in my hand

[00:03:38] Can't you see that I am just a man

[00:03:44] With distinctions and comparisons

[00:04:01] Spare change is the same as wedgies for me

[00:04:06] I don't give it unless someone's really asking

[00:04:19] Saying I apologize is the very same

[00:04:24] As saying I'm sorry they're the same

[00:04:29] Unless you're at a funeral

[00:04:56] To live is the same as to dream

[00:05:01] If you do both long enough you'll see

[00:05:07] But you have to work in between

[00:05:11] Unless you have narcolepsy

[00:05:29] That was a boring solo

[00:05:33] Earrings are the same as sneezes

[00:05:39] Two is okay but ten in a row is annoying

[00:05:49] If you have two then god bless you

[00:05:58] These are sames and opposites my friends

[00:06:03] Which I have determined

[00:06:16] A secret admirer is the same as a stalker

[00:06:21] With stationery

[00:06:31] An ex girlfriend is the same as an okay movie

[00:06:37] I liked it at the time but I don't want to see it again

[00:06:46] Especially if the movie was kind of a bitch

[00:06:58] These are sames and opposites my friends

[00:07:04] Which I have determined

[00:07:08] So far